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previous: III.85C‑94B This webpage reproduces a section of The Deipnosophistae of Athenaeus published in Vol. I of the Loeb Classical Library edition, 1927 The text is in the public domain. This page has been carefully proofread and I believe it to be free of errors. If you find a mistake though, please let me know! next: III.106E‑116A

(Vol. I) Athenaeus
Deipnosophistae

Book III
(Part 3 of 5)

 p405  94C Following these viands platters were passed round containing many kinds of meat prepared with water, — feet, heads, ears, jawbones, beside guts, tripe, and tongues, in accordance with the custom in shops at Alexandria called "boiled-meat shops." "This word, Ulpian, is found in Poseidippus, in The Slave."​1 And while the company were further inquiring for authors who had named any of these foods, one of them said: "The edible tripes are mentioned by Aristophanes in The Knights,​2 'I will declare that you are selling tripe untithed.' DAnd again he says:​3 'Why, good sir, won't you let me wash the tripe and sell my sausages instead of laughing at  p407 me?' Still again:​4 'I'll gulp down a beef-gut and a pig's tripe, then drink up the broth, and without stopping to wipe my mouth I'll outbawl the orators and confound Nicias.' Again:​5 E'Ay, the daughter​6 of a mighty sire gave me a piece of meat cooked in broth, and a slice of guts, of tripe, and of belly.' Cratinus mentions the jawbone in The Plutuses:​7 'fighting for the jawbone of an ox.' And Sophocles in the Amycus​8 says, 'makes jawbones soft.' Plato, in the Timaeus,​9 writes: 'He (God) also joined together the ends of their jawbones under the conformation of the face.' And Xenophon, in the Art of Horsemanship​10 mentions 'a small, contracted jaw.' FSome pronounce the word with a u (suagon) by analogy with the word for swine (sus)."

Epicharmus mentions sausages, calling them oryae, a name by which he even entitles one of his plays, the Orya.​11 Aristophanes says in the Clouds:​12 "Let them make sausages of me and serve me up to the students." Cratinus in the Wine-flask:​13 "How thin, said he, is this slice of sausage!" So Eupolis in the Goats.​14 And Alexis in Leucadia, or The Runaways:​15 95 "A slice of sausage has arrived, and some mincemeat." Antiphanes in the Nuptials:​16 "Cutting out the middle slice of a sausage."

 p409  Feet, ears, and the snout are mentioned by Alexis in Crateia, or The Apothecary; his testimony I will quote a little later,​17 since it contains many of the terms under discussion. Theophilus in the Pancration-Fighter:​18 "A. Of boiled dishes there are nearly three pounds' weight. — B. Tell us more! — A. A snout, a ham, four pigs' feet, — BB. Heracles!​19 — A. and three ox-feet." Anaxilas in The Caterers:​20 "A. More satisfactory to me by far than verses from Aeschylus is baking fish. — B. What's that you say, fish? You mean to make your messmates sick. How much better to boil trotters . . . snouts and feet." And Anaxilas in Circe:​21 "Having the snout of a pig, dear Cinesias; it was awful!" And in Calypso:​22 C"I realized then that I bore a pig's snout."

Ears are mentioned by Anaxandrides in his Satyrias,​23 and Axionicus in The Chalcidian​24 says: "I am preparing a stew by warming over a fish until it is hot, putting in morsels that have been left over and moistening them with wine, slashing in some entrails seasoned with salt and silphium, a slice of sausage, and a bit of tripe, with a snout well soused in vinegar; and so you will all agree that the next morning's fare is better than that at the wedding the night before."  p411 DAristophanes in The Rehearsal:​25 "Alack, I have tasted the entrails of my children; how shall I look upon that scorched snout?" And Pherecrates in Frills:​26 "For is not this simply a swine's snout?"

There is also a place called by this name, Snout (Beak), near Stratus in Aetolia, according to Polybius in the sixth book of the Histories.​27 And Stesichorus, in the Boar Hunters, has:​28 "to hide the tip of the snout under­ground." That the word "snout" is properly applied only to swine has already been explained;​29 Ebut that it may be applied also to other animals, and even be used jocosely of the human face, is shown by Archippus in the second edition of Amphitryo:​30 "Although he has a snout so long." So Araros, in Adonis:​31 "For the god is turning his snout toward us."

The word acrocolia ("trotters") is used by Aristophanes in the Aiolosikon:​32 "And what is more — for I had almost forgotten it — I boiled four trotters for you Funtil they were tender." And in the Gerytades:​33 "Trotters, wheat loaves, and crayfish." Antiphanes in The Woman of Corinth:​34 "A. And then a pig's foot to Aphrodite? Ridiculous! — B. But you don't know. In Cyprus, my master, the goddess takes such delight in swine that she keeps the beast from feeding on dung, but has forced that  p413 job upon the oxen." As a matter of fact Callimachus (or Zenodotus), 96 in Historical Notes,​35 testifies that the pig is sacrificed to Aphrodite, in these words: "The people of Argos sacrifice swine to Aphrodite, and the festival is called the Feast of Swine." Pherecrates, in The Miners,​36 has these lines: "There were close at hand, on platters, whole hams with shin and all, most tender, and trotters well boiled." Alexis in The Dicers:​37 "After we had just finished a luncheon from a bit of trotter." So too, in The Vigil (or Toilers):​38 "The meat is only half-done, the mincemeat is spoiled, Bthe eel is boiled, but the trotters are not yet ready."

Pherecrates mentions boiled feet in The Slave-Teacher:​39 A. "Tell us how the dinner is progressing. — B. Well then, you are to have a piece of eel, a squid, some lamb, a slice of sausage, a boiled foot, a liver, a rib, a vast number of birds, cheese with honey sauce, and a portion of beef." Antiphanes in The Parasite:​40 "A. There are smoked pigs' knuckles. — B. A nice luncheon, by the goddess of home! — A. Yes, and a lot of melted cheese was sizzling over them." CEcphantides, in The Satyrs:​41 "Whenever he had to buy and eat boiled pigs' feet."

 p415  The tongue is mentioned by Aristophanes in Masters of the Frying-pan:​42 "No more anchovy for me! I am bursting with the greasy stuff I've eaten. Rather, to take the taste away, bring me a piece of liver or a glandule from a young boar, or failing that, a rib or a tongue or a spleen; or fetch me the paunch of a sucking-pig killed in the autumn, with some hot rolls."

DWith so much said on these matters, the physicians present did not fail to contribute their share. For Dionysocles said: "Mnesitheus of Athens, in his work on Victuals, remarked that the head and feet of a pig contain little nourishment or fat." And Leonidas quoted Demon, who says, in the fourth book of his Attic History:​43 "Apheidas, when king of Athens, was assassinated by his younger brother Thymoetes, a bastard, who thereupon became king. In his reign Melanthus of Messenia was banished from his native land Eand asked the Delphic priestess where he should find a home. And she made answer, 'Wherever, on being received as an honoured guest, he should have the feet and the head served to him at dinner.' And this actually happened to him at Eleusis; for when, in the course of the observance of some ancestral festival, the priestesses had consumed all the meat and only the feet and the head were left, these were sent to Melanthus."

Next was brought in a swine's matrix, a veritable metropolis and mother to the sons of Hippocrates,44  p417 who, as I know, were ridiculed in comedy for swinishness. FAfter glancing at it Ulpian said, "Come now, my friends, in what author is the matrix mentioned? We have filled our bellies full, and it's high time that we do the talking; I urge the Cynics to be still, since they have foddered themselves without stint. But perhaps they would like to gnaw to pieces the bones of the jaw and the head; there is no objection to their enjoying that kind of food, being Dogs. For that is what they are, and they boast of the title. 97 Moreover, 'it is the custom to throw the remnants to the dogs,' as Euripides has said in The Women of Crete.​45 In fact, they will eat and drink anything, never taking to heart what the divine Plato said in the Protagoras:​46 'To talk about poetry would make our gathering like the symposia of common and vulgar men. For being unable, through lack of cultivation, to amuse one another in company at a symposium, by their own resources or through their own voices and conversation, they raise high the market-price of flute-girls, hiring for a large sum an alien voice — that of the flutes — and for this they come together. BBut wherever men of gentle breeding and culture are gathered at a symposium, you will see neither flute-girls nor dancing-girls nor harp-girls; on the contrary, they are quite capable of entertaining themselves without such nonsense and child's play, but with their own voices, talking and listening in their turn, and always decently, even when they have drunk much wine.' That is what you Cynics do, Cynulcus. When you drink — or rather when you drain — you are like flute-girls and dancing-girls in thwarting the pleasure of conversation,  p419 Cliving, as Plato again describes it in the Philebus,​47 'the life, not of a human being, but of a mollusk or some other creature of the sea which has breath, and for its body a shell.' " And Cynulcus, in a burst of temper cried out, "You glutton, whose god is your belly, and with no wit for anything else! You are ignorant of the art of connected discourse, you cannot recall the facts of history, or even so much as make a slight offering with a graceful phrase. No, you have misused your whole time in asking 'is such a word found or not?​48 DIs it used or not used?' And you test every word that occurs to your companions in talk as one tests a smooth surface by drawing his nail over it, collecting all the thorny places, 'like one making his way through prickly plants and thorny liquorice,'​49 for ever wasting time, but never gathering the flowers that are sweetest. You are the one who tells us that what the Romans call strena ('New Year's gift'), a name and a custom of friendly giving handed down by ancient tradition, is the epinomis.​50 Now if you call it that in competition with Plato, we should like to know [what the one has to do with the other].​51 But if you have found it in any author, tell us who he is. For myself, I know that a certain part of the trireme is called epinomis, according to citations given by Apollonius in his book On the Trireme. EYou are the one who uttered that new word phainoles,​52 not yet accepted in good use — yes, sir, phainoles has become masculine! — when you said, 'Slave, Leucus! give me that useless phainoles!'​53 Once, when you  p421 were on your way to a public bath, did you not answer somebody who asked you where you were going, 'I am hurrying, said I, to mash​54 myself'? On that same day your fine Canusian coat was stolen by sneak-thieves, and loud mirth arose in the bath when the 'useless phainoles' could not be 'found.' And on another occasion, dear mates (for to you shall be told the truth), Fhe stumbled on a stone and wrenched his ankle. After having it attended to, he went on his way, and to all who asked, 'What ails you, Ulpian?' he would say, 'a black eye.'​55 I happened to be with him and could not restrain my laughter on the occasion. Later I was visiting a friend, a physician, and I got him to smear my eyes thickly with a salve; and then, when people asked me, 'What's the matter with you?' I would reply, 'I sprained my eye.'

"Now there is also another devotee of this same pedantry, Pompeianus of Philadelphia, a man not without guile, 98 and a word-chaser on his own account. Why! Talking to his slave he would call out his name in loud tones and say, 'Strombichides, carry my intolerable​56a pumps and my useless​56b mantle to the gymnasium. For after I have laced up​57 my beard I am going to address the brethren. For I must cook up Larichus.​58 Fetch, too, the oil jug; for we twain will first have a drub down,​59 and then we will mash ourselves.​60 This same wiseacre once remarked  p423 to one of his friends (it was in the month of February, as the Romans call it,º Bwhich, according to Juba,​61 king of Mauretania, received its name from the spirits of the underworld and the ritual of dispelling the fears they inspired;​62 in this month winter is at its height, and it is customary at this season to offer libations​63a to the departed for several days), 'You have not seen me for many days on account of the burnt-offerings.'​63b During the celebration of the Panathenaea, when the courts do not convene, he said, "it is the natal day of Athena Pullet​64 and to‑day is an "unjust"​65 day.' And on one occasion he even called a friend of ours 'useless' when he returned from Delphi without receiving an oracle from the god.​66 COnce, when he was delivering in public a show speech, expatiating on the glories of the Imperial City, he said, 'Marvellous is the unstable​67 empire of the Romans.'

"This, my friends,​68 is the kind of men who form Ulpian's learned coterie, men who actually give the name 'oven-cauldron' to what the Romans call a miliarium, a contrivance for making hot water. They are the inventors of many strange terms, out-running by many leagues the Sicilian Dionysius, Dwho used to call a maiden 'wait-man' because she waits for a  p425 husband,​69 or a pillar 'stand-hold' because it stands and holds, or a javelin 'hurl-against' because it is hurled against one, or mouse-holes 'mice-keepers' because they guard mice. Speaking of this same Dionysius, Athanis, in the first book of his Sicilian History,​70 says that he called the ox 'earth-earer' and the pig iacchos.​71 Like him also was Alexarchus (brother of Cassander, once king of Macedonia), the founder of the city named Uranopolis. EConcerning him Heracleides Lembus, in the thirty-seventh book of his Histories, narrates the following:​72 'Alexarchus, founder of Uranopolis, introduced peculiar expressions, calling the cock "dawn-crier," the barber "mortal-shaver," the drachma "a silver bit," the quart-measure "daily feeder," the herald "loud bawler."​73 And on one occasion he sent this strange message to the authorities of Cassandreia:​74 'Alexarchus, to the Primipiles of Brother's Town, joy: Our sun-fleshed yeans, I wot, and dams thereof which guard the braes whereon they were born, have been visited by the fateful dome of the gods in might, fresheting them hence from the forsaken fields." FWhat this letter means, I fancy, not even the god of Delphi could make out.' It is like what Antiphanes makes his Cleophanes say:​75 'But is that "being your own master"? — or what shall you say of a respectable man who follows the sophists about in  p427 the Lyceum — thin, worthless starvelings — declaring that "this thing has no being because it is becoming, 99 and what is becoming cannot yet be said to have become; nor, supposing that it once had being, can that which is now becoming be, for nothing that is not, is. Again, that which has not yet become cannot be until it has become, seeing that it has not yet become; for it has become from that which is; but if it had not had being from something how could it have become out of what is not? That were impossible. But if it has had birth from something somewhere, then it cannot be that what is not shall be born into what is not; Bfor into what is not it cannot pass." What all this means not Apollo himself could understand.'

"But I am aware that even Simonides the poet​76 somewhere calls Zeus Aristarchus ('noblest ruler'), and that Aeschylus​77 called Hades Agesilaus ('lord of the folk'), while Nicander of Colophon​78 called the creature known as the asp 'poison-shooter.' Moved by these and similar fantastic usages the most admirable Plato, speaking in the Politicus​79 of certain animals which traverse dry land, and of others which traverse the air, applies the terms 'walking on dry land,' 'walking in water,' and 'walking in the air' to land animals, water animals, and birds, Cby way of exhorting these word-fanciers to avoid strange novelties. His words literally quoted are:​80 'If you will take care not to be too particular about mere names, you will end in being richer in wisdom when old age comes on.' I am aware, too, that Herodes Atticus, the orator, denominated the block of wood which is thrust between the spokes of a wheel 'a  p429 wheel-shackle' on the occasion when he was driving down steep roads, and indeed Simaristus, in his Synonyms, called this block a 'check'; and Sophocles, too, Dsomewhere names the watchman 'a bar to fear' in this verse:​81 'Have courage! I am thy mighty bar against this fear.' In another passage​82 he calls the anchor a 'stay'​83 because it holds back the vessel: 'The sailors drew up the stay of the ship.' Demades also, the orator, used to say​84 that Aegina was 'the eyesore' of Peiraeus, that Samos was a 'fragment' broken from the empire, that young men are 'the spring-time' of the people, the walls of a city are its 'garb,' and a trumpeter was the 'public cock' of Athens. And this same word-chasing sophist used to speak of a woman whose menses had been checked as 'uncleansed.' EWhen it comes to yourself, Ulpian, how did it occur to you to say 'foddered themselves' when you should have used the word 'satisfied'?"

To this Ulpian, with a pleasant smile, replied: "Nay, do not bark, comrade, nor grow savage, shooting forth canine​85 madness during the dog-days; rather, you should fawn on and wag your tail at your convives, lest we turn our holiday into a dog-slaughter Flike the one celebrated at Argos. 'Foddered,' my good sir, is a word used as I have used it by Cratinus in the Odysseis:​86 'All day long ye sat and foddered yourself with pure milk.' Again, Menander​87 in Trophonius used the past participle 'foddered'; and Aristophanes in Gerytades:​88 'Take care of her and fodder her with monodies.' So, too,  p431 Sophocles in Tyro​89 says: 'With food of every fodder we entertained our guests'; 100 and Eubulus in Dolon:​90 'Gentlemen, I have foddered myself not badly, nay, I am full, and so, try as hard as I might, with all my efforts I could scarcely lace my shoes.' Sophilus, also, in The Colonel of Horse:​91 'There is going to be gluttony at large expense; I can see its beginnings. I shall fodder myself to the full. By Dionysus, gentlemen, I am in clover already.' And Amphis in The Sky:​92 'When evening comes I fodder myself on everything that's good.' BThese examples then, I can readily cite now for your benefit, Cynulcus, but to‑morrow, or on the morrow's morrow, — Hesiod​93 speaks of the second day hence in this way — I'll fodder you with blows if you don't tell me where the word 'belly-god' is found. When Cynulcus made no answer he resumed: "Very well, my Dog-sage, I will tell you this myself — that Eupolis denotes flatterers by that word in the play of that name;​94 but I will postpone the proof until I pay you the beating I owe you."

They were all delighted with these jests, and Ulpian continued: "What is more, I will render an account of the word mêtra ('swine's paunch'). CAlexis, in the play entitled The Man from Pontus, by way of ridiculing the orator Callimedon, surnamed 'crayfish,' who was active in politics in Demosthenes' time, says:​95 'Every man is willing to die  p433 for his country, but Callimedon the Crayfish would doubtless submit to death for a boiled sow's paunch.' Now Callimedon was a notorious gourmand. DThe paunch is mentioned also by Antiphanes in Fond of his Mother, thus:​96 'If the wood has pith in it, it can put forth a sprout; a town is a mother-city, not a father-city; the matrix is a delectable meat sold by some; Metras the Chian is one whom the people love.' So Euphron in The Surrendered Girl:​97 'My teacher prepared a paunch and served it to Callimedon; and while he ate it, it made him jump, whence he got the name of crayfish.' EAnd Dioxippus in A Foe to Pimps:​98 'What dishes he hankers after! how refined they are! sweetbreads, paunches, entrails.' And in The Historian:​99 'Through the portico burst Amphicles, and pointing to two paunches hanging there he cried, 'Send Callimedon here if you see him.' So Eubulus in Deucalion:​100 'Chicken-livers, a jejunum, and a haggis and paunch.'

"Lynceus of Samos, intimate friend of Theophrastus, also knows of the use of the paunch with silphium extract. At any rate, in his description of Ptolemy's symposium Fhis words are: 'A paunch was passed round, served in vinegar and silphium juice.' This juice is mentioned by Antiphanes in Unhappy Lovers, speaking of Cyrene:​101 'I will not sail back  p435 to the place from which we were carried away, for I want to say good-bye to all — horses, silphium, chariots, silphium stalks, steeple-chasers, silphium leaves, fevers, and silphium juice.'

101 "The special excellence of the vulva eiectitia​102 is mentioned by Hippocrates, author of the Egyptian Iliad, in these lines: 'Rather, let me be cheered by a casserole or the lovely countenance of a miscarried matrix, or a sucking pig whose smell comes deliciously from the oven.' And Sopater says in his Hippolytus:​103 'How the fecund miscarried matrix rounds out cheese-like in the stew, covered with white sauce!' In the Man of Science he says:​104a 'A slice of sow's matrix not over-cooked, Bwith pungent brine-and‑vinegar sauce inside.' And in Bookworms:​104b '. . . That you may eat a slice of sow's matrix boiled, dipping it into the bitter gall of rue.'

"As to the ancients, however, none of them had the custom of serving swine's paunches or lettuce or any other like relish before a banquet, as is done to‑day. Archestratus, at any rate, the inventive genius of cookery, speaks​105 of it after the dinner, the toasts, and the smearing with perfumes: C'Always crown the head at a banquet with chaplets of all the myriad flowers wherewith earth's happy floor doth bloom, and dress the hair with fragrant, distilled unguents, and on the soft ashes of the fire throw myrrh and frankincense, Syria's redolent fruit, all the livelong  p437 day. And as you sip your wine let these relishes be brought to you — pig's belly and boiled sow's matrix floating in cummin and vinegar and silphium; also the tender tribe of birds roasted, such as the season affords. But disregard those Syracusans, Dwho drink frog-fashion without eating anything; nay, yield not to them, but eat the food I tell you. All the other common desserts are a sign of dire poverty — boiled chick-peas, beans, apples, and dried figs. Yet accept a cheese-cake made in Athens; or failing that, if you get one from somewhere else, go out and demand some Attic honey, Esince that will make your cheese-cake superb. This is the way in which a freeborn man should live, else down below the earth, even below the pit and Tartarus, he should go to his destruction and lie buried countless fathoms deep.'

"Lynceus, however, in his description of the dinner given by the flute-girl Lamia in honour of Demetrius Poliorcetes represents the guests as eating all sorts of fish and flesh the moment they entered the dining-room. Similarly, describing the arrangements for King Antigonus's dinner, Fwhen he celebrated the festival of Aphrodite, as well as the dinner given by King Ptolemy, he says that fish and meat were served first.

"We may well admire Archestratus, therefore, the author of the excellent admonitions just quoted. Anticipating the philosopher Epicurus in his doctrine of pleasure, he gives us advice in wise sayings after the manner of the poet of Ascra,​106 telling us not to follow certain persons, but rather to heed only himself, and urging us to eat this and that; precisely like the cook in the comic poet Damoxenus, who says, in  p439 Foster Brothers:​107 'A. 102 In me you see a disciple of the sage Epicurus, in whose house, let me tell you, I "condensed"​108 four talents in less than two years and ten months. — B. What does this mean? Explain! — A. I "consecrated" them. That fellow, too, was a cook — ye gods, he knew not what a cook he was! Nature is the primal source of every art, the primal, you sinner! You cannot imagine anything cleverer than she, and every undertaking is easy to one who is versed in this doctrine, Bsince much conspires to help him. Wherefore, when you see an illiterate cook, one who has not read Democritus entire or rather does not know him by heart, spurn him as an empty fool; and if he knows not the Rule of Epicurus, dismiss him with contempt, as being outside the pale of philosophy.​109 For you have got to know, good sir, the difference between a horse-mackerel in winter and one in summer; next, what fish is most useful Cat the time the Pleiad sets, and at the solstice. For mutations and movements, to men abysmal evil, work changes in their food, you understand; but that which is eaten in proper season yields gratification. But how many can follow all this with understanding? As a result, colic and winds arise, and make the guest behave with impropriety. DBut with my cooking, the food that is eaten nourishes, is properly digested and — exhaled. Hence the juices  p441 are distributed evenly in all the passages. The juice, says Democritus, causes no trouble; it is what subvenes that makes the eater gouty. — B. It looks to me as if you knew something of medicine also. — A. Yes, and so does anyone else who penetrates Nature. But observe, in the gods' name, Ethe ignorance of modern cooks. When you see them making a pickled sauce out of fish of contradictory qualities, and grating a dash of sesame into it, take them in turn and — tweak their noses! — B. How delightful! — A. Ay, for what possible good can come when one individual quality is mixed with another and twisted together in a hostile grip? FDistinguishing these things clearly is a soulful art, not washing dishes or reeking with smoke. For myself, I never enter the kitchen. — B. Why, what do you do? — A. I sit near by and watch, while others do the work; to them I explain the principles and the result. "Softly! the mincemeat is seasoned highly enough."​110 — B. You must be a musician, not a cook! A. "Play fortissimo with the fire. Make the tempo even. The first dish is not simmering in tune with the others next it." 103 Do you catch my drift? — B. Save us! — A. It's beginning to look like an art to you, what? You see, I serve no course without study, I mingle all in a harmonious scale. — B. What does that mean? — A. Some things are related to each other by fourths, by fifths, or by octaves. These I join by their own proper intervals, and weave them in a series of appropriate courses. Sometimes I  p443 superintend with admonitions like "What are you joining that to?" "What are you going to mix with that?" "Look out! You are pulling a discordant string." "Leave that out, won't you?" BEven so did Epicurus condense pleasure into the sum of wisdom. He could masticate with care. He is the only one who knows what the Good is. They of the Porch​111 are always seeking for it, but they don't know what its nature is. What, therefore, they have not got and do not know, they cannot impart to anyone else. B. I quite agree. Let us, then, dismiss the rest of your story; it has long been plain what it is.'

Baton, also, in The Fellow-Cheater, portrays a father in distress over his young son, whose manners have been spoiled by his nurse.​112 CHe says:​113 'You have taken my boy and ruined him, you foul wretch, have lured him into a life foreign to his nature. He now takes a morning cup through your influence, something he never did before. — DNURSE: And so, master, you blame me if he has seen a bit of life? FATHER: Life, do you call that life? — NURSE: Yes, the wise so call it. Epicurus, anyhow, says that pleasure is the highest Good; everybody knows that. You cannot have it any other way, whereas by living well, of course all live rightly. Perhaps you will grant me that? — FATHER: Tell me then, have you ever seen a true philosopher drunk, or beguiled by the doctrines you preach? — NURSE: Aye, every mother's son of them. At any rate, those who walk with eyebrows uplifted, and seek in their discussions and discourses for "the wise man," as if he  p445 were a runaway slave, once you set a sea-lizard before them, know so well what "topic" to attack first, Eseek so skilfully for the "gist or head of the matter," that everybody is amazed at their knowledge.'

"Then, too, in The Soldier, or Tychon, by Antiphanes, there appears a fellow who gives this advice, saying:​114 'Any mortal man who counts on having anything he owns secure for life is very much mistaken. For either a war-tax snatches away all he has saved, or he becomes involved in a lawsuit and loses all, For he is fined after serving in the War Office, or is chosen to finance a play, and after supplying golden costumes for the chorus​115a he has to wear rags himself; or called to serve as trierarch,​115b he hangs himself, or sailing in his ship he is captured somewhere, or as he takes a walk or a nap he is murdered by his slaves. No, nothing is certain, 104 except what one may chance to spend happily upon himself day by day. And even that is not so very certain. Somebody might come and carry off the very table spread with food. Rather, it's only when you've got your mouthful past your teeth and have swallowed it down that you can count it the one thing safe among your possessions.' The same lines occur also in The Water Jar.

b"So then, my friends, when one considers these facts, he must with good reason approve the noble Chrysippus for his shrewd comprehension of Epicurus's 'Nature,' and his remark that the very centre of the Epicurean philosophy is the Gastrology of Archestratus, that noble epic which all philosophers  p447 given to hearty eating claim as their Theognis.​116 It is against these also that Theognetus pronounces in The Ghost or Miser:​117 'You'll be the death of me, fellow, with all this! You have stuffed yourself sick with the puny dogmas of the Painted Porch, that C"wealth is not man's concern, wisdom is his peculiar possession, being as solid ice to thin frost; once obtained it is never lost." Unlucky wretch that I am, to be compelled by fate to live with such a philosopher! You, poor fool, must have learned your letters backwards; books have turned your life upside down. You have gabbled your silly philosophy to earth and heaven, which pay no heed whatever to your words.' "

While Ulpian was still talking, slaves entered, carrying on platters some crayfish larger than the orator Callimedon, who, because of his for fondness for this viand, was called "Crayfish." DAlexis, to be sure, writing in Dorcis, or The Woman Who Smacks, calls​118 him fish-lover, following a tradition common to other comic poets as well: "The fishmongers have voted, so people say, to raise a bronze statue of Callimedon in the fish-market at the next Panathenaea,​119 holding in his right hand a crayfish; for they regard him as the sole saviour of their business, Eall other customers being a loss." Yet the eating of crayfish was extremely popular, as may be shown by many  p449 passages in comedy. For the present it will suffice to quote Aristophanes, who says, in the Thesmophoriazusae:​120 "A. Hasn't anybody bought a fish? a squid, may be, or some broad prawns, or a polyp? Is there no broiled faster or salmon, and no squids? — B. No, Zeus help us, none at all. — A. Not even a ray? — FB. No, I tell you! — A. No haggis or beestings or boar's liver, not even honey or pig's paunch? Have you not even supplied the weary women with an eel or a large crayfish?"

By "broad prawns" he must mean lobsters, as we call them, mentioned by Philyllius in The Island-Towns.​121 And this may be inferred from the fact that Archestratus, in his famous poem, does not even mention the word crayfish, but speaks of it as lobster, as in the following:​122 105 "But letting a lot of trash go, buy yourself a lobster, the kind which has long claws, and heavy withal, with feet that are small, and but slowly crawls he upon the land. Most of them, and the best of all in quality, are in the Liparae Islands; yet the Hellespont also gathers many." Further, Epicharmus, in The Marriage of Hebe, makes clear that the lobster mentioned above by Archestratus is the same as the cray, when he says:​123 B"There are lobsters and crabs as well, and the creature with small feet and long claws, and its name is cray."

 p451  But the crayfish variety is quite distinct from that of the lobster, and shrimps, again, are different. Those who speak Attic Greek pronounce the word for lobster with an o (ostakos), like the word for raisins.​124 But Epicharmus, in Earth and Sea,​125 has the form with a, "lobsters (astakoi) with crooked claws." Speusippus, in the second book of Similars, says that among the soft-shell crustaceans the crayfish, lobster, nympha, bear-crab, common crab, and pagurus crab are alike. Further, Diocles of Carystus says that shrimps, crabs, crayfish, and lobsters are well-flavoured and diuretic. CAccording to Nicander,​126 another kind of crab, the colybdaena, is mentioned by Epicharmus in the play cited above, under the name of "sea-phallus;" but Heracleides, in his Art of Cookery, says that he means the shrimp. Aristotle, in the fifth book of The History of Animals,​127 says: "Of the soft-shelled crustaceans, the crayfish, lobsters, shrimps, and the like copulate from the rear, like the retromingent quadrupeds. Coition takes place at the beginning of spring near the shore (it has long since been observed in the case of all these creatures), but in some regions it occurs later, when the figs begin to ripen. DThe crayfish, he adds,​128 multiply in rough, rocky places, the lobsters in smooth, but neither occur on muddy grounds. Hence we find lobsters in the Hellespont and off the coast of Thasos, but crayfish off Sigeium and Mount Athos. All crayfish, moreover, are long-lived." Theophrastus, too, in his tract on Animals which live in holes,​129 asserts that lobsters, crayfish, and shrimps slough off old age.

Speaking of shrimps (karides), Ephorus in Book III  p453 records​130 that there was a town of that name near the island of Chios, and he declares that it was founded by the survivors of the flood, led by Macar, in Deucalion's time; and even to his day the place was called Karides (Crayville). EThat artificer of fancy dishes, Archestratus, gives this advice:​131 "If ever you go to Iasus, city of the Carians, you will get a good-sized shrimp. But it is rare in the market, whereas in Macedonia and Ambracia there are plenty."

The word karis is used with a long i by Araros in The Hunchback:​132 "The squirming shrimps leaped forth like dolphins Finto the rope-twined pot." Also by Eubulus in Orthannes:​133 "I let down a shrimp and pulled it up again." Anaxandrides in Lycurgus:​134 "He sports with the shrimplets among the perchlets and whitebait, with the sole among the gobios, and with the shiners among the gudgeon." This writer says, in Pandarus:​135 106"You can't be straight, good friend, when you are bending over: and so this woman twists and squirms like a shrimp anchored fast to your body." Likewise in The Tail:​136 "I'll make you redder than a broiled shrimp." Eubulus, in The Nurses,​137 has the phrase "shrimps, among creatures that have arched backs." And Ophelion,  p455 The Ugly Fair,​138 speaks of "curved shrimps heaped together on dry land"; and again in The Wail from the East:​139 "as curved shrimps leap on coals, Bso danced they."

On the other hand, the word karis is used with a short i by Eupolis in The Goats:​140 "Except that once I ate some shrimps in the house of Phaeax"; and in The Demes,​141 "He had the face of a shrimp, as red as a leather belt."

Shrimps (karides) got their name from kara, "head," for the head takes up the biggest part of the body. Attic writers, employing the word with a short i, derive it in the same way: it comes from karê, "head," because of the prominent head it possesses. CJust as graphis, "graver," comes from graphê, "picture," and bolis, "missile," from bolê, "a throw," so also karis from karê. Since the penult was lengthened the ultima was lengthened also, and it is pronounced like psêphîs, "pebble," and crêpîs, "boot."

Concerning these crustaceans Diphilus of Siphnos writes thus: "Among the crustaceans the shrimp, lobster, crayfish, crab, and lion-crab, though of the same family, differ from one another. The lion-crab is larger than the lobster. The crayfish are also called grapsaei; Dthey contain more meat than the crab. Crab-meat is heavy and hard to digest."

 p457  Mnesitheus of Athens, in his work on Victuals, goes further and says that "crayfish, crabs, shrimps, and the like are all hard to digest, yet are more digestible than any other kind of fish, and should be broiled rather than stewed."

Sophron uses the form kurides for karides Ein his Mimes of Women:​142 "Lo, the beauteous kurides (shrimps), lo, the lobsters, lo, the beauties! Behold how red they are and smooth-haired!" So Epicharmus in Earth and Sea,​143 "the red kurides too"; but in Lord and Lady Logos,​144 he spells it with ō, "small fry and crooked kōrides." So also Simonides:​145 "cuttle-fish with tunny, kōrides with gudgeon."

---

The Loeb Editor's Notes:

1 Kock III.341. The speaker is probably Cynulcus.

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2 300.

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3 l. 160.

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4 Eq. 356.

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5 1178.

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6 Athena.

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7 Kock I.63.

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8 T. G. F.2.154.

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9 75D.

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10 ch. 1.8.

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11 Kaibel 110.

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12 455.

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13 Kock I.72.

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14 Kock I.264.

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15 Kock I.344.

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16 Kock I.40.

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17 Below, 107B.

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18 Kock I.475. The pancration was a combination of wrestling and boxing.

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19 Himself a glutton, invoked for protection against gluttony.

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20 Kock I.269. See critical note.

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21 Kock I.267.

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22 Kock I.266.

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23 Kock I.155.

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24 Kock I.415.

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25 Kock I.510.

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26 Kock I.173.

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27 Chap. 59 Hultsch.

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28 P. L. G.4 III.14.

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29 Comparing Schol. Aristoph. Av. 348, we see that something has been lost.

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30 Kock I.679.

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31 Kock I.215.

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32 Kock I.393; cf. Aristoph. Ran. 558.

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33 Kock I.430.

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34 Kock I.61.

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35 Frag. 100H 1 Schneider; cf. Schol. Aristoph. Achaea. 793.

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36 Kock I.175; Athen. 269A.

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37 Kock I.339.

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38 Kock I.363.

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39 Kock I.157.

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40 Kock I.87.

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41 Kock I.9.

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42 Kock I.522.

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43 F. H. G. I.378.

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44 Nephew of Pericles. There is a pun on υἱῶν ("sons") and ὑῶν ("swine"). The mention of μητρόπολις is equivalent to saying that the physicians present (referring to the great Hippocrates) will feel at home with the μήτρα before them. For the sons of Hippocrates (not the physician) see Aristoph. Clouds 1001, and Scholiast.

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45 T. G. F.2 504.

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46 347C.

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47 21C.

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48 Cf. 1E.

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49 From an unknown poet, quoted also by Plutarch, Mor. II.44E.

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50 A word of three meanings: a present at New Year, the title of a work ascribed to Plato, part of a trireme.

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51 See critical note.

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52 Lat. paenula, "cloak," became masculine in Greek.

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53 For a cloak which he had never worn he used a word (ἄχρηστον) which also means "useless."

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54 Quoting an anonymous line, he used an archaic form for "wash myself," as though from ἀπόλλυμαι, "be destroyed."

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55 The point is that ὑπώπιον is properly a bruise on the eye (Aristoph. Achaea. 551), πρόσκομμα a bruise on the foot (Eustathius 914.40).

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56a 56b He uses ἀφόρητος ("unworn") and ἄχρηστος in the sense of "new," whereas they mean "intolerable" and "useless."

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57 Properly used of buckling a sandal, and thus derisively calling attention to the length of his beard.

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58 The pretentious expression for "he must be visited" also means "he is in the oven."

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59 Instead of the simple τρίβω, "rub down." The pedantic use of the obsolete dual is to be noted, especially in the first person, which was very rare even in classical times.

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60 Also, "go to the devil," as in 97E.

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61 F. H. G. III.470.

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62 i.e. Φεβρουάριος, quasi φόβους οὐδαίους αἴρειν, "dispelling fears of the underworld."

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63a 63b Accompanied with incense and burnt offerings (καύματα), which he substitutes for "heat."

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64 Alector, "cock," is used of the Virgin Goddess. It suggests Ἀλεξίκανος, "averter of evil." The translation "pullet" is meant to recall Athena Polias, "guardian of the city."

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65 For "unholy," μιαρὰ ἡμέρα, on which it was unlawful to do business.

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66 ἄχρηστος from χρῶμαι, "use," instead of from χράω, "deliver an oracle," which the pedant intended.

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67 ἀνυπόστατος in classical authors meant "unshakable," but later "without solid foundation."

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68 Cynulcus continues to 99E.

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69 μένω, "await," ἀνήρ, "man." The other fantastic terms are similarly derived. Thus μένειν, "wait," κρατεῖν, "hold," give menekrates; βαλεῖν, "throw," ἐναντίον, "against," balantion, with play on ballantion, "purse"; cf. "purser," and "piercer"; μῦς, "mice," τηρεῖν, "keep," with play on mysteria, "mysteries"; γᾶ or γῆ, "earth," ἀροῦν, "plough," Old Eng. "ear," garotas.

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70 F. H. G. II.82.

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71 Properly a name of Bacchus, here "squealer," cf. ἰάκχω, "cry out."

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72 F. H. G. III.169.

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73 But this last is Homeric, Iliad VII.384, at least as adjective.

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74 Named after his brother Cassander.

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75 Kock I.58, a satire on the Eleatic metaphysics.

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76 P. L. G.4 frag. 231.

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77 T. G. F.2 116.

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78 Frag. 33 Schneider; properly of Artemis, "arrow-shooter."

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79 264D.

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80 261E.

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81 T. G. F.2 295.

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82 T. G. F.2 296.

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83 Properly "dried fig."

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84 Frag. 4 Tur.

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85 With a pun on "cynic."

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86 Kock I.57.

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87 Kock III.133.

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88 Kock I.429.

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89 T. G. F.2 276.

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90 Kock I.175.

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91 Kock I.446.

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92 Kock I.244.

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93 Op. 410.

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94 Flatterers, Kock I.306; cf. 97C.

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95 Kock I.368.

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96 Kock I.108. The first word in each line puns on the word "mother," μήτηρ.

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97 Kock III.322. The title may have been Παρεκδιδομένη, Wrongly Wedded.

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98 Kock III.358.

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99 Kock III.359.

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100 Kock I.173.

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101 Kock I.46. The speaker is bored by the Cyrenaic boast of producing the best horses and silphium. Hence the repetition.

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102 Of a sow which has miscarried.

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103 Kaibel 194.

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104a 104b Ibid. 196.

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105 Frag. 62 Ribbeck.

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106 Hesiod.

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107 Kock III.349.

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108 Philosopher's word, used as slang for "made my pile."

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109 For διατριβή, "philosophic school," see 211C, 350A.

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110 περίκομμα also suggests περικοπή, a musical passage or phrase; and ὀξύ, "sharp," also has a musical sense. Hence "you have pitched it high enough."

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111 The Stoics.

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112 The old male slave appointed to attend little boys.

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113 Kock III.328. The quotation recurs 279A.

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114 Kock I.98.

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115a 115b The χορηγία and τριηραρχία were state services ("liturgies"). In the latter a citizen helped to equip a trireme, the expenses of which were heavy.

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116 Equivalent to a Book of Proverbs. The second book of the Theognidean collection contains verses suitable for reciting at dinner-parties.

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117 Kock III.364.

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118 Kock I.316.

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119 Quadrennial festival to Athena at Athens.

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120 Women celebrating the festival of Demeter, Founder of Law. The passage is from the second (lost) play of this title, not from the extant play; Kock I.473.

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121 Kock I.785; cf. 86E.

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122 Frag. 8 Ribbeck.

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123 Kaibel 101.

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124 ostaphides for astaphides.

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125 Kaibel 95.

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126 Frag. 189 Schneider.

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127 Hist. An. V.541 B19; cf. Athen. 319D.

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128 549 B13.

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129 Frag. 177 Wimmer.

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130 F. H. G. I.242.

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131 Frag. 24 Ribbeck.

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132 Kock I.217; cf. 86D.

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133 Kock I.192.

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134 Kock I.144. All the names of the fish mentioned are in diminutive forms; for κωθάρια, apparently the same as κωβίδια, cf. 304E.

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135 Kock I.149.

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136 Kock I.143.

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137 Kock I.204.

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138 Kock I.294.

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139 Kock I.293.

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140 Kock I.259.

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141 Kock I.286.

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142 Kaibel 158.

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143 Ibid. 95.

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144 Ibid. 107.

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145 P. L. G.4 frag. 15.

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