Monday. My other wife has been having quite a time lately. It is so light at reveille that he has been waking up early and then getting in a frenzy of fear that he has missed formation. My sane wife took it upon himself to explain about the solstices and how the sun rises earlier at some times than at others. He made no headway but I finally told my other wife the brownies did it, which explanation did content him. I fear me that when we go on daylight saving time there is going to be trouble.
Tuesday. In drawing today my other wife found out that the cross hairs were in the transit for a purpose and were not just dirt. After this discovery he reduced his error by a half and said he was thinking of making a career of surveying. Lately my sane wife has been sitting around telling us in a hearty voice that parades are not far off, ha, ha. Tonight he was calling imaginary batts to and shining his breastplate when my other wife bit him. This biting is another unpleasant habit my other wife has picked up; no one can now go into his alcove without being snapped at.
"He was calling imaginary batts to. . ."
Wednesday. I thought that everything that possibly could have, had happened to me, but I was in error. At present we are being taught life saving. My other wife is very poor at this. As far as I can see the only thing that keeps him up is surface tension, as once he goes under, he stays under. My sane wife was practicing the carries on me today and as usual overdid it. After he tried the hair carry he had enough of my scalp to make any Indian jealous. Sometimes I sit for hours wondering how I stay alive. And sometimes I wonder if I have, or if I am reaping the rewards for a misspent life.
Thursday. Spring vacation starts tomorrow. For the past few days my other wife has been saying spring vacation and then making a nasty hacking noise which from him means ironic laughter. I have been chiming in with him at times.
Friday. Long week‑end is here. I know because somebody told me. Gazed about the house today.
Saturday. My sane wife at loose ends today because of no S. I. An exceptionally amusing Donald Duck cartoon was shown tonight. My other wife was so taken by it he gave tongue like a howling dog and had to be led out.
Sunday. I love Sundays. My wives love Sundays. Everybody I know loves Sundays.
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The Collected Works of Ducrot Pepys
History of West Point
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Page updated: 16 Aug 12