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Bill Thayer

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November 8

This webpage reproduces a section of
The Collected Works
of Ducrot Pepys

Ronan C. Grady

Newburgh, N. Y., 1943

The text is in the public domain.

This page has been carefully proofread
and I believe it to be free of errors.
If you find a mistake though,
please let me know!


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December 6
This site is not affiliated with the US Military Academy.

 p12  November 22, 1940 . . . .

Monday. It is too bad that Caligula is dead. He would have paid well for a seat in the boxing room. I think I shall wash my gym shirt tomorrow. This afternoon I found it had almost escaped from my roll. We cast up accounts today. The other wife just went over to the Treasurer's office to see if he would match double or nothing.

Tuesday. My sane wife went on sick call today as he has been having a bit of trouble with his feet. He returned looking dazed and carrying a bottle of gargle. We had tactics this afternoon. A very interesting subject, although I have some difficulty dismantling a machine gun. The instructor said he has seen Orang-outangs that were cleverer with their hands.

Wednesday. I really fear the coming of Winter. Both my wives insist on keeping the windows wide open. A procedure which is shortening my life and which has forced me to huddle, shivering, over my cigarette lighter these last two nights. The way I see it, fresh air besides being cold is laden with a lot of strange germs that will crowd one's own domesticated germs out of one's body and raise hob with one's system. But these two gawks refuse to listen to reason. We have been taking Fall Tests lately. As I am already on corrective exercise for swimming, I have nothing to worry about.

Thursday. Today my other wife bought a magazine about Astrology. Tonight he cast my sane wife's horoscope. My sane wife immediately made plans for a disposition of his effects and put in a request that he be granted full military honors. I sometimes wish he were not so impressionable. His sobbing kept us awake for quite some time.

Friday. A great ringing of bells last night. My other wife, who had been dreaming of his old life, got up and hunted for a telephone for ten minutes. He is more of a worry than ever. Today discovered him sticking pins in a little wax doll wearing a Sam Browne bracelet and a sword. Tonight he told us to just wait until the dark of the moon. Navy game tomorrow.

Saturday. My sane wife up betimes to get ready for the trip. About three o'clock he woke us up so we could help him. We stunned him and laid him back in bed. Train ride uneventful except that my other wife with his usual ability for doing the exasperating thing became train-sick. Everyone was greatly amused. The game was excellent.​a However, my sane wife caused an undue disturbance in the stands upon finding the metal band encircling the smaller end of the megaphone firmly set between his extended jaws, immediately following the first touchdown. Afterwards we had a very enjoyable time. Upon entraining my other wife became most incensed at being deprived of a highly odorous animal he claimed to have won from the midshipmen. So home and to bed.

[image ALT: A drawing of an agitated group of four young men wearing distinctive uniforms (long capes, trousers with wide stripes down the legs) One of them is furious, weeping, and stomping on the ground; two others restrain him, and a third, to our right, holds his nose with his left hand and with his right, by the tail, a dead animal, possibly a goat, with a malevolent expression. It is a cartoon of West Point cadets disposing of a gift from the midshipmen of the Naval Academy.]

"My other wife became most incensed. . ."

Sunday. I wonder where my sane wife went last night; whenever you ask him he says, "Oh Boy!" and nothing more. There are only seven buttons left on his F. D. coat. Everyone slept busily today.

Thayer's Note:

a Nov. 30, 1940: Army lost, 14‑0. Further details are given in Army-Navy games from 1890 to 2006, brought to the Web by USMA, Class of 1962.

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Page updated: 16 Aug 12