Monday. It seems that those dreams I have been having about not attending reveille are not dreams. I must watch this. My other wife is now carrying on an affaire du coeur with some young lady. It seems to be going well for he is offensively good natured. He spends part of his time in his locker singing songs and part rushing around doing good. Doing good becomes him as much as it would a shark. I can stand almost anything but if he pats me on the back once more and says "I love you no matter what you are, buddy" I shall hit him with the heaviest thing to hand, gibbering all the while. Drew again today. The trip up to the Drawing Academy was harder than usual. We went on instruments from the sixth to the ninth levels due to a heavy fog.
Tuesday. Had an excellent day today. No one spoke harshly to me or struck at me all day long. I wonder what Fate is softening me up for.
Wednesday. I would like to find the man who told me that Spanish was much easier than French. I want some of him as a souvenir. Cast up my accounts today. It gives me great pleasure to find out that I would not go on Christmas leave anyway. I am so happy that I am going to catch a dog and kick it.
Thursday. My other wife has not received a letter from his inamorata for two days now and is no longer good natured. He has bitten me once and my sane wife who is slower on his feet three times and at present is writing another letter to Santa Claus in which he asks only for a ray gun. I like him better this way than happy. He is much easier to deal with. Before one had to worry about hurting his feelings. Now one merely hits him whenever he comes within reach. We gave thanks today and also ate remarkably well.
"My wife is no longer good natured."
Friday. My sane wife has been busy these past few days making wee jackets out of Blitz to protect his breast plates during the winter. I have no quarrel with the idea but I do believe that his putting patch pockets on them is extreme. My other wife is very angry because no one will try to talk him out of committing suicide.
Saturday. Caught a cold today. I am not worried as most diseases I catch are starved out in three days but the sight of a germ always upsets my corpuscles.
Sunday. Unless the pictures in the Mess Hall stop winking at me I am not going to eat there any more.
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Page updated: 16 Aug 12